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Character Development
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“Oh great. Jesus fucking Christ. Can you believe this shit?”

APB’s storming back and forth in his Hotel Room just hours after Monday Mayhem has gone off the air. Amanda looks up from her magazine and arches her eyebrows.

“Hum?”

APB points to his laptop.

“Phenom.”

Amanda shrugs her shoulders.

“So?”

APB slaps his forehead.

“God damned mother fucking Phenom!”

Amanda goes back to her magazine.

“You’ve faced him before right? I’m sure you can do it again.”

APB screams and pulls his (short) hair.

“AND EVERY DAMN TIME HE KICKS MY EVER LOVING ASS! HE GANG RAPES ME RIGHT IN THE DAMNED CENTER OF THE RING!

Besides that. DID YOU EVEN WATCH THE FUCKING SHOW TONIGHT?

Dude got played by Ramon. Dude got played hard by the lil shit….

Noms going to be on a fucking warpath!”

APB pauses. He looks at the ceiling.

“Why the FUCK am I facing ‘Nom this week? What the fuck did I do?”

A look comes over APB’s face…. He snaps his fingers.

“God Damn it. That’s got to be it…

Chester and SG. Those two trumped up little dickwads. They’ve paid Phenom off to kick my fucking ass for me. They’re fucking afraid that Kent Clark and I will take their precious stinking Tag Titles.

They’re so scared, they are sending that BEAST after me.”

Amanda calmly turns the page.

“So…. just… y’know? Beat him and get it over with.”

APB just stares at Amanda with a blank look on his face.

“…. Really? Really? That’s your brilliant fucking plan? ‘Just beat him’? JUST FUCKING BEAT HIM? Jesus Christ! While I’m at it, why don’t I just go out there and stick a lead pipe up Fallen Angels ass and get him pissed off at me too? Maybe after that I can go and wave my magic wand and magically make Aaron Roberts as cool as he thinks he is.”

Amanda laughs

“Better be a huge magic wand.”

APB once more slaps his forehead.

**Sigh**

“That’s not it. That’s not the point. Right now I’m in a damned f’n slump. In case you haven’t noticed I’m getting my ass kicked every god damned week. I’m a god damn fucking loser… Right now I couldn’t ‘beat’ Phenom if he had both hand tied behind his back.”

APB stops and looks himself in the mirror on the wall. He begins to whisper to himself.

“I’m getting old. Too old for this crap. I’m losing my edge… I’m losing my passion…. All it would take…. All it would take…..”

APB looks longingly at the drawer under the mirror. He knows what is in there. But no, that’s not the answer. No matter how much he thinks it could be. He’s NOT a coward of that level. Amanda breaks APB out of his dark thoughts.

“Say, doesn’t Phenom like money?”

APB nods his head.

“Yeah. I’m sure Dipshit and Asshole gave him quite a bit to kick my ass. Prolly going to send him after Clark as well….

Bastards…..

To think I trusted the……..”

Amanda interrupts, without looking up from her magazine.

“What if you offered more money to not ‘kill you’?”

APB glares off into space.

“I couldn’t….. He wouldn’t….. Could I?….. Would he…..?”

APB stares off into space for a few more moments…

“Nah.”

Amanda puts the magazine down, then walks over to APB, she puts her hands on his shoulders and looks him directly into his eyes.

“Now listen here. HAVE you EVER given up?”

APB shakes his head.

“No.”

Amanda smiles.

“How many times have you been beaten, only to fight back?”

APB smiles back.

“Every damn time.”

Amanda’s smile grows.

“What’s the best way to thwart the Commonwealths plans then?”

APB thinks…. you can even see the little gears moving behind his eyes… But no smoke.

“Uhm…..”

Amanda shakes her head.

“Allen, it’s simple… OK, fine you can’t ‘beat’ Phenom. He’s got your number and can kick your ass… Well don’t ‘beat’ him. Don’t ‘win’ the match. Just go out there and make sure he doesn’t hurt you. Just make sure that you walk out of the match with your head held as high as you can.”

APB just looks a tad suspicious at this.

“And how do I do this….?”

Amanda smirks.

“You don’t have to ‘win’ a match to ‘win‘ a match. If you are the only one standing… You are the victor… No matter what the results say…”

APB looks away from Amanda and looks into the mirror.

“I think I see where this is going.”

APB smirks to himself.

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In Ring: Trash Talk
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COME TO LIFE by AlterBridge blasts out of the P.A. System. There is a mixed reaction of boos and cheers as APB steps out of the back. He adjusts his leather jacket as he walks down to the ring. When he reaches the ring, he rolls in. After the music stops, APB holds up a microphone and begins to speak.

APB: When I first looked down at that little piece of paper we get backstage every week at the end of Mayhem… That little piece of paper that tells us what we’ll be doing next week. Who we’ll be fighting, or IF we’ll be fighting….

Well, I’ll admit this week I was just a little frightened. Just a little concerned.

APB lowers the microphone, takes a deep breath and continues on.

APB: See, I looked down and saw that I had a match. That’s a plus. It’s always good to have a match…. That’s what we fucking do…. But then. Then I saw the name across from mine.

APB looks out at the crowd. He frowns… Takes another deep breath then goes on.

APB: I would have been happy to see S.G. Martins. I would have been happy to see Chester Addison. I’d of been happy to see any of the Desert Sex goons…. But no. I didn’t see any of those names. No… I get a name from the past. I get Fucking Phenom.

The crowd react to this…. A mixed reaction? There are a fair number of fans that seem to like seing people just get the shit beat out of them it seems.

APB: I’ll be honest. I was freaked out. I haven’t had that much look against this guy. I’ve teamed up with him… I’ve feuded with him… I’ve fought him…

I’ve done all of that, and every single time… It’s ended the exact same way.

Allen ‘Portal’ Bartsch, laying in a pool of his own blood… Battered, Bruised and Beaten….

APB pauses for a few moments. He’s getting a fairly mixed react… Oh, I think I’ve said that a few times…. anyways… He is getting a mixed reaction.

APB: So… Like I said, I was freaked out. How the hell am I going to beat this guy? What could I possibly do to make it past him so that I can concentrate on Ice Storm and showing those douchecocks the Commonwealth Connection that even an old dog can learn new tricks?

I thought about it. I thought about it long and hard.

APB reaches into his pocket… he pulls out a checkbook.

APB: And the answers I came up with were simple. One, I could just fight my hardest. I KNOW I can fight with ‘Nom. I know I can get the shit beat out of me. I KNOW that afterwords I can do like I always do and crawl my way to the back… Lick my wounds and come back for more….

Or…….

Or… I could do the smart thing. ‘Nomer… I know you’re back there. I know you’re listening to this… Prolly masturbating to thoughts of hitting me over the head with your big baseball bat. So listen to this ‘big man’…

I know The Commonwealth had to set up this match. I KNOW those Douchecocks have to be paying you to kick my ass…. So whey don’t you come out here and I can just write a check… Then you can get paid twice and just not have to do any work….

Think about it big man. Think about it. You’re getting paid twice. You don’t have to break a sweat kicking my ass… and you can spend all that energy going after Ramon…. Dude… It’s an awesome plan…..

So…..? What do you sa………………